The Psychology of Affection & Hatred
The Psychology of Affection & Hatred
Human beings are made up of emotions; and love & hate are basic human emotions. They are also closely linked within the human mind.
The feeling of loving and admiring a friend, spouse, or family member is very uplifting. Despite the problems and differences that come with that deep relationship, love has always a way to win through everything.
But, what happens when the seeds of dislike & hatred start to grow in a garden of affection? You find yourself filled with both appreciation and contempt for the same person? It happens that people love and hate the same person.
Why does that happen?
Why you like & dislike the same person?
When people are deeply in love with someone, they yearn for the same man or woman; it seems as if it’s impossible to live without them. It is a situation of deep attachment and sometimes, irrationality, to some extent.
The fascination, at times, is so strong that it’s almost impossible to forget it. But when the behaviour of the same person changes, or if a small fight breaks out over any issue, then detachment and dislike happen automatically. It may result in hatred as well.
So, you are feeling love for the same person and also repulsion for the same person and that happens, because life is all about duality; it’s bipolar.
People have to see summer-winter, happiness-sadness, and triumph-failure. They are natural parts of life. You hang between attachment & detachment, the opposite poles. Between these poles life revolves.
Duality is an integral part of life
A majority of people spend their entire life, staying entrapped in this duality only. Either they are in the state of happiness or extremely distressed. For many, it’s almost impossible to get available to the state of poise and equanimity.
Lord Krishna, however, says in the Gita, get detached and be established at the middle point. Lord Buddha has called this marvellous situation, ‘the middle path’.
It means, do not pursue anything madly. Do not dislike or like anything or anyone in extremes, or practice intense hatred, rather get established in the midway and stabilize your mind otherwise, you may go unwise and may become extremely disturbed in due course.
Walk the Middle Path
Also, with a desire for wealth, properties, a big house and more one spends sleepless nights. But as soon as the person acquires it all and starts enjoying it, he becomes envious of someone else’s riches. Now he feels detachment with what he has and desires for something better.
Ultimately, such a person wants to keep his ego at a higher level. And if it becomes a habit, it creates a disturbance in the long run.
Understand that if a person is attached can also get detached, but no one endeavours to walk the middle path.
At times, try to walk this path.
It will fulfill your ultimate desire- freedom from pain and availability to bliss.
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With the divine blessings of HH Shri Sudhanshu Ji Maharaj and the enlightened guidance of Dr. Archika Didi Ji, the transformative 4-day Raghav Dhyan Sadhana Shivir unfolded successfully from December 2nd to 6th, 2023, in the sacred city of Ayodhya, Uttar Pradesh. Organised by Vishwa Jagriti Mission.